I Am Jack Bauer

I may not be saving the world from terrorists like Jack Bauer, but I am running around the world like a madman. I feel like I'm a losing contestant on The Amazing Race with all the plotting and planning I've been up to lately. This country is complete chaos and I wouldn't necessarily recommend a visit. It's a little bit like a 3rd world country at times, which is not what I was expecting.

The good news is that the violence in Bangkok seems to have calmed down today. The protesters are going home, although the situation certainly isn't resolved so don't plan any future vacations. Read a news update here. Thanks for all your concerned comments and emails... nice to know some people are keeping track of my whereabouts!!


Outside of Bangkok, the rest of the country has erupted in less violent, but equally disorganized chaos. As I mentioned previously, we are in the middle of Songkran, the Thai New Year. This means people take to the streets for massive water fights. Not just a squirt gun... I'm talking about throwing gallon buckets full of water on you. Everyone in the country seems to own a pick-up truck. They pack about 20 people in the bed of the truck ranging in age from infant to grandma (along with a garbage can full of water for refills) and drive around the city soaking everyone and everything in sight. Yesterday, it took my "bus" (meaning a covered pick-up truck) about 1 hour to drive 12km. In addition to water, I was also doused with some kind of orange substance. Gatorade? This must be what it feels like to win the Superbowl.

Every single town is like this. You can't walk out of your hotel without getting absolutely soaked-to-the-bone drenched. Music is blaring. It is a combination of Thai music and American hip-hop. If I never again hear "...she wore them apple bottom jeans..." I will be a happy woman. At first, the festival seemed to mostly involve small children. They are laughing like crazy, soaking wet, and very cute. But now it seems to be more a drink-fest and it is not so cute.

This Songkran business is amusing for about the first 2 hours. The party slowly built up over the last few days and reached full force yesterday and today. I think there are at least 2 more days ahead. The celebration also involves paint. People like to put handprints on you. Luckily, this easily washes out of clothes. I lost count of how many people stroked my face with paint today. Gross. I'm waiting for the acne breakout. But it's definitely better to play along and smile. Short of barricading yourself in a hotel, it is impossible to avoid the water. Also, I saw a foam party in the middle of the town square today. It is like Carnivale up in here!!

Here is today's Top 10 List (and it is only 7:00pm).

1) I woke up extra early to go online and check out what happened in Bangkok overnight. My travel plans largely depend on this news. Seems like things are getting worse. Shots fired, 2 people dead, buses on fire...


2) I send a text message to my cousin Kelly to go online so we can "google chat." Gotta love technology! She is supposed to fly into Bangkok to meet me on the 15th. She is due to leave Boston in 10hrs. She still wants to come. Our plan is to head south to hit the beaches, which are totally safe, but the problem is that you're forced to travel through Bangkok. I consider my options... I can backtrack all the way up north to Chiang Mai and take a direct flight down South. Kelly offers to stay in the airport overnight (her flight doesn't arrive until 11pm) and catch a flight down South the next morning. In the end, we decide to book a night at the swanky Bangkok airport hotel where I had my overnight layover a few weeks ago. It is a FORTUNE by Thai standards, but I think it is the safest bet. The hotel is right next to the airport, 30km out of the city. This means Kelly won't have to set a foot in Bangkok city. I, on the other hand, will have to get myself from the Bangkok train station to the hotel. Hoping the roads will be clear and the train station will be open (it was closed on Mon). As Kelly and I close down our chat, we decide that I'll buy us plane tickets to get the hell out of Bangkok the very next day. My biggest concern at this point is that protests will shut down the airport like they did in December. Then we'll really be screwed.

3) With that decided, I eat a quick breakfast and check out of my hotel in Sukhothai. I get a ride to the bus station in some contraption. That's the only word to describe it. It wasn't even a proper tuk-tuk (which are scary in their own right). This was like a motorcycle, but with 2 wheels in the front and a platform with 2 bench seats. Needless to say, both me and my luggage get soaked on the short ride to the bus station. I'm an easy target for these kids.


4) I arrive at the bus station having no idea what the bus schedule is. It seems next to impossible to find accurate bus or train timetables online. I buy a ticket to the town on Phitsanoluk, only about 1.5 hours away. This bus is much nicer and roomier than the bus I took from Chiang Mai the other day. My guide book outlines in great detail the difference between all the different classes and types of train/bus tickets. But when I'm in the thick of it at the bus/train stations with staff who don't speak English, it's very hard for me to tell what type of ticket I'm buying. It's luck of the draw.

5) My bus arrives in Phitsanoluk. I want to go straight to the train station to continue further south to the town of Lopburi. (My hope was to get about halfway to Bangkok today.) A woman meets me outside the bus and asks the usual, "Miss, where you go?" She is driving a motorbike. "But I have luggage," I tell her. She says this is okay, and I don't see any other form of transportation available. Alright, here we go... She jams my giant backpack between her and the front of the bike. I hop on behind her wearing a skirt, a small pack on my back and my purse slung across my shoulder. There are no helmets in sight. We go zooming through the streets of Phitsanoluk and I'm pretty sure I'm going to die. As we drive past the throngs of kids with buckets, she simply holds up her hand. And surprise... they do not splash us! I am starting to like this woman. Then we arrive at the train station. Me being unaccustomed to motorbikes, I BURN THE SH*T out of my leg climbing off the bike. I must have hit the engine or something. The baseball-sized burn on my leg is still hurting many hours later. I would buy some ointment if only I had the foggiest clue of where to find such an item.

6) I see the train platform off in the distance, but the woman has stopped on the "wrong" side. There are about 8 sets of train tracks between me and the ticket platform. "How do I get there?" I asked her. She just points. "Do I walk?" I really can't believe this is happening. "Yes, walk, walk!" she says as if I am in idiot for even asking and shoos me away. So there I am with 20-some pounds of luggage on my back, my leg on fire, trekking across 8 sets of train tracks. This time, I was really sure I was going to die...

7) I get in line at the ticket office. I am sweating buckets. The man tells me the train to Lopburi is full. I really wanted to see Lopburi, a town of ancient ruins overrun with monkeys. But that is SO far down on the list of priorities at this point. I figure I can stay in Phitsanoluk and get a train straight to Bangkok tomorrow. There are like 6 trains a day. To my utter HORROR, the man tells me the only option left tomorrow is a 3rd class seat. All the trains are booked because of the Songkran holiday (I imagine this is like trying to book a flight the Sunday after Thanksgiving.) OMG. I tell the man I'll come back later. I take a seat and feel sorry for myself for a few minutes. I have read such horrible things about these 3rd class trains. They don't have AC and the seating is wooden benches. The ride is 8 HOURS. I can't imagine why it takes this long... we must stop at every podunk town along the way. But I simply don't have another choice, so I bought the train ticket for tomorrow morning at 7:20am. I need to get to Bangkok and I'm sure as hell not taking a bus into town. The red shirts have commandeered buses, used them as roadblocks, and set them on fire.

8) I take another rickshaw-like form of transport to a hotel in Phitsanoluk. It has a TV with the BBC news channel in English. Over the course of a few hours, it appears that the protests in Bangkok are over. The red shirt leaders have ordered everyone to go home. Everything I'm seeing and reading says Bangkok is getting back to normal (if you can ever consider Bangkok "normal"). Bangkok is a huge city and all the forums I'm reading say most of it was fine even during the worst of the riots. I now think it's probably safe to stay at a more economical place in town.

9) Upon leaving my hotel to explore flooded Phitsanulok, a van backs into me. Backs straight into me! On an ordinary day, this would be the first thing on my list to tell you. Today, I barely blink an eye. I didn't fall over... just a big stumble before I caught myself.

10) I text Kelly again to let her know the updated situation. She is just waking up for her flight. She agrees with me that it's okay to change the hotel reservation. I cancel the airport hotel and make a new reservation in Banglamphu... a section of Bangkok full of tourists that has seen no trouble. With the last few cents of credit on my mobile phone, I text Kelly the address of the new hotel so she can get a cab. We're still only going to spend one night in Bangkok, maybe 2 to help Kelly recover from her jet lag depending on the atmosphere. I have no desire to stick around that crazy place.


That's all the news that's fit to print!! I hope plans don't have to change again. And I hope I don't suffocate on this 8 hour, 100 degree train ride tomorrow. Send me thoughts of popsicles and pina coladas!! The Thai beaches better be worth all this hassle :) If and when I ever get there, I am going to park my caboose in a hammock for a good week.